Loading
Loading
Psalms
Psalms 73 — Envy, doubt, and finding your way back to God
5 min read
This is — one of leaders — having a full-blown crisis of . He's watched terrible people absolutely thrive while he's out here trying to live right and getting nothing but problems for it. It's the kind of doubt that eats at you slowly, the kind you don't always say out loud in .
But this isn't just a rant. It's the whole journey — from almost losing his faith, to walking into the , to having his entire perspective reset. And the ending is one of the most beautiful declarations of trust in all of .
opens with a statement he believes but has been struggling to feel:
"Truly God is good to — to those who are pure in heart."
That's the thesis. God is good. But then immediately:
"But me? My feet almost slipped. I nearly lost my footing. Because I looked around and saw the arrogant absolutely thriving — and I got jealous. Straight up envious of the wicked."
That's the most honest thing you'll read in the Bible today. A leader admitting he almost walked away from his faith because of what he saw other people getting away with. No cap. 💯
Now describes what he's been watching — and it's infuriating:
"They don't even struggle when they pass away. Their bodies are healthy and strong. They skip the problems everyone else deals with. They're not hit with the same pain as regular people."
And because life is easy for them, they lean all the way into it:
"Pride is their whole aesthetic. Violence is their outfit. Their eyes bulge with excess. Their hearts overflow with arrogance. They mock people. They talk about oppression like it's casual. They talk trash against itself, and their words run wild across the earth."
The worst part? People follow them:
"Even God's people turn toward them and see nothing wrong. And the wicked say, 'How would God even know? Does the Most High actually pay attention?' Look at them — always comfortable, always stacking up more."
This is the part that breaks . It's not just that bad people exist — it's that they seem to face zero consequences while getting everything they want. 😶
Here's where hits rock bottom:
"So I kept my heart clean for nothing? I washed my hands in innocence and it was pointless? Because all day long I'm the one getting hit. Every single morning — I'm the one catching pain."
He almost said it out loud. Almost told everyone his doubts. But something stopped him:
"If I had actually spoken those words, I would have betrayed an entire generation of Your children."
Even in his doubt, knew that publicly trashing God's would wreck other people's . So he held it in. But trying to figure it all out on his own was destroying him — he calls it a "wearisome task." He was stuck between what he felt and what he knew. 🧠
This is the turning point. One moment. One location. Everything shifts:
"Until I went into the of God — then I understood their end."
That's it. He walked into God's presence and suddenly saw the full picture:
"You set them on slippery ground. You make them fall to ruin. They're destroyed in a moment — swept away completely by terrors. Like a dream when someone wakes up — Lord, when You rise, You dismiss them like they were never real."
Everything that looked so solid — the wealth, the health, the — was built on a surface that could give way at any second. didn't get new information. He got new perspective. And it came from being in God's presence, not from scrolling through everyone else's life. ⚡
With his new perspective, looks back at his spiral and cringes:
"When my soul was bitter, when I was all in my feelings — I was acting like an ignorant animal toward You. I was a whole beast."
No excuses. No justifying. He owned it. He's basically saying, "I was operating on pure instinct and emotion instead of seeing things the way You see them." That's the kind of honesty that actually leads to growth. 🙏
Now comes an incredibly beautiful part of this entire — and honestly an exceptionally beautiful passage in the whole Bible:
"Nevertheless — I am continually with You. You hold my right hand. You guide me with Your counsel, and afterward You will receive me into ."
Even while was doubting, spiraling, and nearly walking away — God was holding his hand the entire time. He didn't earn his way back. God never let go.
Then the crescendo:
"Whom do I have in but You? And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides You. My flesh and my heart may fail — but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever."
That's saying: I looked at everything the wicked had — the money, the comfort, the easy life — and none of it compares to having You. My body can break. My heart can fail. But You are enough. Forever. 🔥
closes with the contrast — and it's :
"Those who are far from You will perish. You put an end to everyone who is unfaithful to You."
And then the final declaration:
"But for me — it is good to be near God. I have made the Lord God my refuge, so that I can tell of all Your works."
That's it. That's the whole psalm. The wicked looked like they were winning, but proximity to God is the only real victory. Everything else is smoke. walked in doubting, spiraling, and jealous — and walked out with the clearest vision of his life.
Being near God isn't just good. It's the good. And that's the only W that never expires. 🪨
Share this chapter