Goshen

Exodus

Frogs, Gnats, and Flies — God Said What He Said

God sends frogs EVERYWHERE (yes, even in the bed), gnats that humble the magicians, and flies that wreck the whole country. Pharaoh keeps saying he'll let Israel go, then changes his mind the second things calm down. Classic fumble behavior.

Exodus

Three Plagues and Pharaoh Still Won't Budge

God sends plagues five, six, and seven on Egypt — livestock drop dead, boils break out on everyone (even the magicians are cooked), and a hailstorm hits that's literally unprecedented. Pharaoh keeps saying he'll change, then doesn't. Tale as old as time.

Genesis

The Whole Squad Moves to Egypt

Jacob gets the green light from God to move the entire fam to Egypt. We get the full family roster (it's a LOT of names), and then Jacob and Joseph finally reunite after years apart. Tissues required. No cap.

Genesis

Joseph's Family Gets the VIP Treatment

Joseph brings his fam to meet Pharaoh and secures them the best land in Egypt. Meanwhile the famine hits different and Joseph basically restructures the entire Egyptian economy. Jacob drops his final wish — don't bury me here.

Genesis

You Meant It for Evil, God Meant It for Good

Jacob dies and Joseph gives him the most elite funeral Egypt has ever seen. Then his brothers panic thinking Joseph is about to get revenge, but he drops one of the most iconic lines in the whole Bible. No cap, this chapter hits different.

Joshua

The Day the Sun Got Put on Pause

Five Amorite kings team up to take down Gibeon, and Joshua pulls an all-night march to catch them lacking. God throws hailstones from the sky, Joshua tells the sun to freeze, and Israel goes on a conquest speed run that's absolutely unhinged. No cap.

Joshua

When Every King Came for Israel and Got Cooked

Every king in the north forms a massive alliance to take down Israel, but God said "nah." Joshua runs a full blitz, wipes out the opposition, takes out the Anakim giants, and finally the land gets to rest from war. No cap.