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Proverbs
Proverbs 31 — A Mom''s Advice and the Ultimate Proverbs 31 Woman
6 min read
This chapter hits different from the rest of Proverbs. It's not talking — it's King Lemuel passing along what his mom taught him. And honestly? His mom understood leadership, character, and what makes someone truly excellent better than most people alive today.
The first half is a mom giving her son real talk about how to lead well. The second half is one of the most famous passages in the entire Bible — a portrait of a woman so capable, so generous, and so rooted in that she's still the standard thousands of years later.
These aren't random proverbs — these are words a queen mother spoke directly to her son, the king. This is personal. This is a mom who made vows over her child and wasn't about to let him waste his potential:
"What are you doing, my son? What are you doing, son of my womb? What are you doing, son of my vows? Don't give your strength to women who will destroy you. Don't hand your future to the things that have taken down kings."
Three times she says "what are you doing" — that's not a casual question. That's a mom who sees her son drifting and is pulling him back. She's not being controlling — she's being honest. The people and patterns you give your energy to will either build you up or tear you down. No in-between. 💯
She keeps going — now she's talking about what leaders can and can't afford to do:
"It's not for kings to drink wine, Lemuel. It's not for rulers to chase strong drink — because they'll drink and forget what's been decreed and twist the rights of everyone who's suffering."
But then she flips it:
"Give strong drink to the one who's perishing, and wine to those in bitter distress. Let them drink and forget their poverty and remember their pain no more."
This isn't a blanket ban on alcohol. It's about responsibility. When you hold power over other people's lives, you don't get to be foggy. The afflicted can seek comfort — but leaders need clarity. That's the weight of authority.
This is the climax of Lemuel's mom's advice, and it goes hard:
"Open your mouth for the mute — for the rights of all who are destitute. Open your mouth, judge with righteousness, and defend the rights of the poor and needy."
That's it. That's the whole assignment for anyone in a position of influence. Your voice isn't just for you — it's for the people who don't have one. If you have power and you're not using it to protect the vulnerable, you're not leading. You're just sitting in a chair. 🫶
Now comes the passage that's been quoted at every women's conference, Mother's Day service, and bridal shower for centuries. And for good reason:
"An excellent wife — who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her completely, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life."
This isn't just a list of things a good wife does. This is a poem — an in the original Hebrew, where each verse starts with the next letter of the alphabet. It's carefully crafted, intentionally comprehensive, and it paints a picture of someone whose value goes way beyond what the world typically measures. No cap — this woman is elite. ✨
Here's where her résumé starts, and it's lowkey intimidating:
"She seeks wool and flax, and works with willing hands. She's like the ships of a merchant — she brings her food from far away. She rises while it's still dark to provide food for her whole household and portions for her workers. She considers a field, buys it, and with the fruit of her own hands she plants a vineyard."
This woman is sourcing materials, running supply chains, waking up before dawn, feeding her whole team, evaluating real estate, and starting a vineyard. She's not just keeping house — she's running an operation. Entrepreneur energy before entrepreneurship was even a word. 🏗️
The description keeps building:
"She dresses herself with strength and makes her arms strong. She sees that her merchandise is profitable. Her lamp doesn't go out at night. She puts her hands to the distaff, and her hands hold the spindle."
She's physically strong, business-savvy, and still working after dark. This isn't burnout culture — this is someone who takes genuine satisfaction in what she builds. She perceives that her work is profitable, meaning she's paying attention, evaluating, and making smart moves. That's in action.
But she's not just about the grind — she's also deeply generous:
"She opens her hand to the poor and reaches out her hands to the needy. She's not afraid of snow for her household — because all of them are clothed in scarlet. She makes bed coverings for herself; her clothing is fine linen and purple. Her husband is known in the gates when he sits among the elders of the land."
She takes care of those who can't take care of themselves AND she's prepared for whatever comes. Her family isn't scrambling when hard times hit because she already planned ahead. And her husband? He's known and respected — partly because of the foundation she's built at home. Her excellence elevates everyone around her. 👑
Now the poem starts moving from what she does to who she is:
"She makes linen garments and sells them; she delivers sashes to the merchant. Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come. She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue. She looks well to the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness."
"She laughs at the time to come" — she's not anxious about the future. She's done the work, she's trusted God, and she's at . Her words carry both wisdom and kindness, which is a combination most people can't pull off. And she's not lazy about any of it. That's not hustle culture — that's a woman who knows her and stays locked in. 🔥
Here's how her family responds to all of this:
"Her children rise up and call her blessed. Her husband also, and he praises her:"
"Many women have done excellently, but you surpass them all."
That's the highest compliment in the whole book. Not "you're pretty." Not "you're successful." You surpass them all. Her family sees the full picture — the early mornings, the generosity, the strength, the kindness — and they honor her for it. That's legacy. That's a life well-lived. 🫶
The poem closes with one of the most important verses in all of Proverbs:
"Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates."
Charm can manipulate. Beauty fades. But reverence for God — that's the foundation everything else is built on. And the final command? Let her works speak for themselves. Don't just say nice things about her on Mother's Day — give her the credit she's earned. Let what she's built be her testimony. That's not — that's the real thing. 💯
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